Monday, January 30, 2012

Grace...Not Perfection




I am my own worse critic. There are a lot of things in life that I am insecure about and mommy-hood has opened up an entirely new dimension to my insecurity. But with the exhaustion, the daily challenges, and the steep learning curve, I just don’t have time for my insecurities anymore. The second guessing, the mommy comparing, and everything else that unfolds in the mommy universe.

I am using this post as my declaration to rise above my self doubt and give myself a pat on the back for getting this far. For raising a happy and healthy baby and managing to keep up with his frequent night wakings, his fast approach towards the fussy teething stage, and the absolutely adorable (albeit messy as sin) experimentation with solids.

I need to stop pretending that this is easy or telling myself that it shouldn't be this hard. I need to be honest that on most days, I don’t even put on a bra, let alone shower. On the days I do shower, it is less about my personal hygiene and more about an opportunity for privacy, alone time, and a breather.

I need to be ok with “coming undone” and to learn to love the frazzled, frizzy-haired, totally strung out woman who looks back at me in the mirror. I need to be less needy of the peer compliments and more willing to be my own cheerleader; my own best friend.

I need to remind myself that every really great mom has/will come across her challenges. It might not be now but at some point whether it’s with teething, sleep regression, SATs or college visits, any mom who is trying her best will stumble over a parenting obstacle.

I need to remember my parenting goals- raising a happy and healthy baby who is compassionate and confident. And the easiest way to teach these traits is to be/do/embrace these traits. And most of all, I need to strive for a standard of grace and not perfection.

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